The two things you are thinking that get in your way every day

Mums in Biz Show - Episode 25

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It is so confusing trying to get your business moving today because there are so many people out there telling you “exactly what you need to do” to create a business that will (supposedly) blow you away with the results that you get.

Yeah - a bunch of it feels like a load of BS to me too.

But what I think is really important is figuring out how to be authentically you in how you move forward. There are some simple, logical things that you need to get right to succeed in your business...but what makes the difference for how you find your breakthrough point in biz is figuring out how to follow those steps while still being you.

So I’ve created The Thriving Business Roadmap with you in mind. The Mum in business who is looking for guidance on how to grow your business and remain truly connected to your values. For the woman who wants to know what she needs to focus on and master to make results come quickly.

Grab your copy here and get started on your success journey.

This week I am all about a couple of little phrases that creep their way into all of our heads at one point or another and I'm telling you - they can have a serious impact on your confidence!

Are you curious? I bet you are, go-on let’s dive in and see if we can’t shift some of that thinking.

The first one is three little words… "I know this" or "I know that".  

Those little words that pop into your head whenever you hear something that might maybe you have heard before. Or it could be a strategy that you know about … and most likely have never implemented… or you did, and it didn't work for you.

Have a think for a little second what this means. Just by thinking these three little words, you are shutting down any learning that you could have through the experience. You are completely disregarding anything that the person might be saying after you think "I know this"..

You are stopping your mind (and more importantly, your sub-conscious!) from gleaning an insight that just might create the aha moment that you really need to create a breakthrough in your business (or your life!).

Do you have all the answers? What do you think it does to your confidence when you are constantly assuming that you have all the answers? And then not getting the results.

See sometimes, that person might be telling you something that you know in detail and have tried and maybe you got a result from it, or maybe you didn't but that doesn't mean that it isn't a valuable strategy! You might just need to try it again to get the results going. Or maybe you need to do it at a different time, when you've got more experience under your belt.

I reckon this comes from our need to BE the expert in all the things. We think that if we don't have all the answers, then somehow we aren't worthy to help others or give advice.  \

So the SECOND phrase is "I can't …"  

"I can't find the time"

"I can't get engagement in my business"

"I can't figure that out"

"I can't go live because I'm terrible"

"I can't lose weight"

"I can't understand why she did that"

When you say "I can't" you are copping out on yourself incredibly. You are telling yourself, and your subconscious that you don't believe in yourself. That it is impossible for you to do or achieve that thing.  

You have a choice in everything that you do. So when you say I can't, you are actually making a choice to not do or achieve that thing.  

Another way to think about this is replacing the word "can't" with the word "won't".

Let's see what that does with the phrases that we started with before

"I won't find the time"

"I won't get engagement in my business"

"I won't figure that out"

"I won't go live because I'm terrible"

"I won't lose weight"

"I won't understand why she did that"

How does it feel hearing those statements like that? See when you use words like I can't - you take your power away. You actually do have the power to choose what you do and how you react and … with some practice … how you feel about every situation you find yourself in.  

It's about tapping into that well of strength inside you and making conscious choices.  

By saying “I know that” whenever someone shares something that has worked for them, you are shutting down your mind and subconcious to absorb their experience that might give you the “AHA” moment that you need in your business. And when you say “I can’t”, you are telling yourself that there are other things that are stopping you from doing something.

So let’s recap for a red hot second:

  • When you say or think “I know that” you are completely cutting yourself off from the learning that is going to come from listening to something different

  • Never shut your mind off from the experiences of others. These experiences can help you think outside the box for your business.

  • You can always learn from other’s experience. If something is not working for you - try it again, and do it a bit differently

  • When you start a sentence or a thought with “I can’t”, you are giving away your power and avoiding taking responsibility for the outcome. Of course you can!! There is nearly always a way

  • Try to break the habit by instead replacing it with “I won’t” - this is all about choice my friend, and often acknowledging the choices that you are making by changing the way you are describing it is enough to help you make a different choice and take a different action.

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CEO, Grow your bizNicole Tewierik